Saturday, July 25, 2009

So Here's Da Dish...Weekend Wrap-Up

My Highlights of This Weeks Top Stories!
Seth Rogen Needs to Start Binge Eating ASAP!
I am all about being healthy... more power to you if you can enjoy a leafy garden salad or one of those carmel rice cakes... however....I didn't know it was possible.... but Seth Rogen has become unfunny since he lost all of that weight.

When I flipped through my TV menu and saw that Rogen was on Conan (who I have also concluded is the only red headed man that I will ever be attracted to) I was beyond excited. I loved him in Knocked Up, Superbad and Pineapple Express and I am impatiently awaiting Funny People to hit theaters. But his jokes were "blah" an his akward laughs were painful to watch at made me wonder what happened to that big funny bear with the jew fro? He just looks like a skinny dude with glasses I would see sitting in Starbucks on his laptop with a messenger bag resting on his chair. This horrifies me to say the least.

All I know is that movie "The Green Hornet" better be pretty amazing since he lost all of his weight for the role... in the meantime....can someone please send him a box of donuts or something? Much appreciated....
Ms. Mariah Mimi Carey... Put Some Clothes on....
I am not sure who her stylist is.... but it's time for Mariah to stop wearing the sparkely bikini tops with a skirt. It's time to get age appropriate!

If you really think about it... Mariah's style is comparable to the classic mullet quote "business in the front party in the back."in her case skanky on top (bikini top) and business on the bottom (skirt)....ponder that thought.....

Katie Holmes Pays Tribute...Or Tries Atleast....
Katie Holmes performed on "SYTYCD" aka "So You Think You Can Dance" .... my thoughts.... SIDTYCD... "So I Don't Think You Can Dance."

We cannot deny what happened everyone... Tom Cruise sucked the coolness right out of our beloved Joey Potter and turned her into a Stepford Wife. We already knew she wasn't that much of an actress... now we know she's not much of a dancer either. Furthermore, she couldnt even act like she was a dancer.
Jon Gosselin is a close second to Spencer Pratt on the Douche Scale....
I cannot believe this... but I apologize for my harsh words in the past Kate Gosselin. Even though you may be a wretched shrew... as a woman I guess I can understand there is two sides to every story because by the looks of it Jon is a certified douche & deserved to be treated like a kid. I mean... he is dating one isnt he?

The plot has thickened this week and he is apparently dating a Star Magazine reporter and staying at Michael Lohan's house..... I didn't mis-type... Michael Lohan! That's a father to take advice from Jon. What are you thinking? Next thing you know Michael will be calling Lindsay to go on a date with Jon... even though he's not half the man Samantha Ronson is. I am staying tuned to see where this goes.

I do know one thing... if I see him where another Ed Hardy shirt I will vomit. And the pattern my vomit will actually resemble the likes of an Ed Hardy shirt. The irony!

Khloe Kardashian Lost 20 Pounds... and Gained a Magazine Spread
I would watch the Kardashian show on E! and would get a kick out of Khloe. She was the bigger gal that reminded me a mixture of Chyna Doll and Rosie O'Donnell and I say that in the most non-harsh way. I dug her. She made me laugh and she had a sharp wit about her.
She shared some of her diet tips in Life& Style magazine.. .however.. my personal opinon is she picked up some diet tips from her pal Mary Kate Olsen... just sayin' ....
SAT Question of the Week
Watermellon is the Scarlett Johansson of fruit as the carrot is the Lindsay Lohan of vegetables.

Explanation: Scarlett is juicy, yummy and tasty while Lindsay is skinny, bland and

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